Silence as a Weapon

It has been difficult for me to write this post.  I have learned so many wonderful, positive aspects to silence and that is where I would like to focus. However, when I mention silence to others I am usually bombarded by the person's historical pain from one silent "treatment" or another.  Somewhere along the line of human development silence has crept in the arsenal of human warfare.

Is it an issue of authority?  On the first day of school a child begins to learn to silence her voice.  When you break a rule you are banished to a time out zone, to remain silent. The school librarian is perhaps the most famous shoosher, followed closely by the movie buff.

As an adult if you break the law and are sent to prison your voice is silenced and if you break prison rules you will be sent to solitary confinement. Prison gangs and thugs dominate prison yards, cells and floors; silencing other inmates.

Ok, I'll admit the preceding paragraph is based upon observations of documentaries.  But Western society has long publicly celebrated the strong, silent type male and spread the myth that women talk too much.  It is true silence hurts, even when it is not intended as a weapon.

I recently saw a documentary called My Reincarnation. It was a familiar father son story. Yet unfamiliar because of the reincarnation twist. The son was a recognized reincarnation of the father's uncle. The son grew up in Italy (watching a Tibetan talking with his hands Italian-style was very amusing) and outside of Tibetan culture. The father taught outside the home and around the world; he was greatly appreciated by the community and the son felt disconnected from his father.  The son's main issue? His father did not answer many questions and the son could not understand his father's silence.

Is the silent person the abuser? What responsibility does the other individual hold to interpret silence? Of course it is more complicated than that. Only one truth seems to hold me for further study: evaluate the motivation behind silence before ruling it a weapon.