Unconventional Trust Building

The leadership gurus who authored Credibility: How Leaders Gain and Lose It and Why People Demand It  make a powerful statement: "Every time we follow someone we do not trust, we erode our self-esteem." Every single day my graduate studies push me to find answers to complicated questions.  How exactly do we build or rebuild trust? I reflected, explored and found at least one conceivable path for troubled relationships and organizations. Even though this path is fueled by one of the most basic foundations of human behavior, I found myself questioning it. Why would an easy answer come when I have struggled for answers in every other class?

Neuroeconomist Paul Zak draws on an idea moral philosopher, Adam Smith gave us when he said we are moral because we are social creatures. Regarding the market, Zak says: "I don't need a top down designer to tell everyone what to do. We know what to do. If I'm doing something wrong I'm going to know pretty soon because we are social creatures." Zak's research further indicates 98% of people reciprocate trustworthiness. If this is true and the individual whose trust is betrayed takes a knock in self-esteem, it makes sense why so many believe the worst in others.  Mistrust can be created by manipulators who do not produce the trust molecule and thereby have picked up on the cues of the majority who produce the molecule and because of our social nature respond with empathy and generosity only to discover we've been duped. Ouch!

Zak's earlier research on markets had shown that countries who were trustworthy were also prosperous.  From these studies he discovered the trust molecule oxytocin when given as a supplement induced greater generosity.  In another study he discovers oxytocin creates empathy and this is what makes us help others. Accordingly, empathy and morality walk hand in hand. Knowing the underpinnings of trust and morality means we can also understand how to create it. We can increase our oxytocin through dance, massage, prayer, and hugs.  Now many of these can be practiced in organizations to build trust, but as I grow wiser I think a sniff test is in order. What do I have in mind?

I have always admired huggers--especially when I wasn't one. Here is one story in which a wrong was committed and no excuses were accepted. Juan Mann's resiliency plan included offering free hugs.  In today's world of increased distrust it is no surprise (although it hits high on my absurd meter) Mann's free hugs were banned. Mann set down his free hugs sign and gathered 10,000 signatures of protest and was able to resume giving free hugs.

So, you want to build trust in your organization? Some days it will take everything from you to empathize and show patience to those who have been betrayed. On those days it seems fitting to start with respect and end with a hug.